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I’m even more scared now

I’m even more scared now

Question to Australians in the group –

Hi Supporters

I have a protection order again my horrible Ex Army partner.  2.5 years of hell.

Today I was served a cross application saying he is scared I will break into his house and scare his children.

I’m 5’2 and small.  He is 6’4 tough army that’s been deployed on 3 operations.

I’m sickly scared of him as he has hurt me a lot and gets so angry.

How on earth does something so ridiculous get to go to court?

Does the judge think he is wasting his time?

I’m even more scared now.

How can I help her and my grand babies?

How can I help her and my grand babies?

I am looking for advice My daughter has NPD. I am her target she appears to everyone else as just the most perfectly sweet and kind woman the fallout does affect my husband and other daughters but she goes out of her way to be cruel to me and make me doubt myself I am forever apologising for things I didn’t do she bans  me from seeing my grandchildren she moved Interstate in February 2017 without telling us I am so worried for my two grandchildren aged 11 and 9 my husband is allowed to iMessage them every Saturday but only gets an answer every three or four weeks I actually think she is answering as the messages go to her email address can you give me some advice how I can help her and my grandbabies I think it is my fault I think I smacked her too much as a child she is 44 years old I need to help her and the children.

I fear a continuation of the pattern

I fear a continuation of the pattern

I am married to a woman I adore, for several years now. She had previously divorced her ex-husband after many years (and children together) after discovering he was a closeted homosexual. He’s a textbook narcissist.

Sadly at least one of her children (now a young adult) and perhaps a second one has all the traits as well, and they both have abused her emotionally for many years.

While much is written about narcissistic partners and exes, not much is written about narcissistic and abusive children.

This situation only gets worse, and, as you might suspect. I too am the object of their hate but they channel it through her, not directly at me. They’d love to see us separate and divorce. I don’t want to let them win, and I adore my wife, but it’s a serious challenge a major distraction from important career and personal matters, and makes life very challenging.

I’m careful to not try to fight my wife’s battles for her, but recently had to step up and take one on, and, without getting into details, it somewhat backfired on me.

We watched the Golden Globes on Sunday night and I pointed out to her the severity of all the recent bad acts by males against females, and told her that I’m an ardent supporter of the #metoo movement and think her situation is a subset of it, though the abuse comes from her ex and her children. She actually got it, and the combined flurry of events resonated ! I was so glad. I see a glimmer of light for a brighter future. Sadly, however, she’s never been one to set a boundary and successfully maintain it, and she’s being virtually gang-raped by these people. Her mother is part of the problem, by the way. She started the pattern of abuse that the ex-husband picked up and continued.

This isn’t a new situation and she has long suppressed and conveniently forgotten many many horrifying incidents. I fear a continuation of the pattern.

My wife has engaged in various forms of self-destructive behavior a lot recently, and has recently, several times, attacked me verbally in a drunken rage, which would surprise anyone outside our home as she’s an elegant beautiful woman of class. I’m not sure how much more I can watch and endure.

I’ve seen you post people’s story on your page and ask for followers’ feedback in comments, which I welcome. Thanks

How do you get over 7 years of mental torment?

How do you get over 7 years of mental torment?

A week out living with my mate. How do you get over 7 years of absolute mental torment? I don’t even know who I am anymore. I’m sitting here an absolute broken man completely lost, but I’m so lonely and I’m doing everything in my power to not go back, to not pick up the phone to not give in to her mind games and complete madness, “I’m a mess.” What did everyone do to move on? 7 years of abuse is all I know and I know nothing will change, but I still want to go back!!!! What’s wrong with me?

How can I help her?

How can I help her?

I’m not in the situation of a narcissistic person around me,  but someone very close to me is in a relationship, more of a slave to this man.  I have given advice and she sees the true colours,  but the problem is,  he has her in a financial hold. She doesn’t have money to just pack up and start over and the worst is he knows it. He is seriously destroying her bit by bit mentally,  he knows every button to push. And how to do it without anyone noticing it.  I’m divorced to one so I see a bullshitter from afar.  How can I help her until I have enough money to help her?  She lost so much weight due to stress and depression while he sits on his huge ass and orders her like a maid. Finding a problem no matter how small,  it’s killing me to see her like this and can’t help her at this moment.  I really need advice guys.

Whilst in therapy he has become even more narcissistic

Whilst in therapy he has become even more narcissistic

Hello I’ve come across this site and subscribed. I am a victim of narcissistic abuse I am sure. I figured this about 2 years ago after spending years in turmoil with my husband. I ended up googling the things he did and EVERYTHING lead to narcissism. Anyway I would love to read more about a narcissist in therapy? I am divorcing my husband and he is in rehab for gambling. I believe the gambling is merely a symptom of his NPD. He does not see this. Anyway whilst in therapy he in my opinion has become even more narcissistic?! Is this possible? He now contacts me telling me how everything was my fault and his therapist believes I am co dependant on my mother. I have a close loving family but have always lived independently. He falls out with his family continually and cuts friends off too. He now wishes me to stop the divorce distance myself from family and friends and concentrate on us? He says if I change things HE will come back to ME? I am divorcing him?! He subjected me to years of emotional, physical, verbal abuse and pressured sex. He slept with a prostitute too. Unyet he and ALL the therapists in rehab believe it is because I am close to my family who I might add were very good and welcoming to him?! He even used to say he wished he had a family like mine?! Anyway my question is do therapists miss NPDs . He is very charming and I can imagine how he would come across in therapy. I had hoped for at least some accountability but he has turned it all on to me even more than usual?!

How do I grieve and let go?

How do I grieve and let go?

I’d love feedback from survivors on what they did to move on from their Narco-ex. I have been broken up with mine for 8 months and I still have this overwhelming feeling of love for him. All the literature tells me it’s not love but an addiction to the man he pretended to be. I get that, intellectually, but it’s hard to separate what I know from what I feel. Going back into the dating scene is not my style. How do I grieve and let go? Please help. 😞😖😔

She’s charming and plays the victim

She’s charming and plays the victim

I’m wondering, how do you cope with losing friends to the narcissist? I don’t mind losing the friends who my ex knew first, but there are people who used to mean a lot to me, my friendships into which my ex insinuated herself. When things got tough, she turned to some of them and, of course, they’ve taken her side because she’s charming and plays the victim. I know if I tell these people what really happened I’ll sound “crazy,” just like my ex likes to describe me, and I also value being the grown-up in the situation and not trying to bad-mouth my ex.

I know that the truly decent people are able to accept that there are two sides to a story. I’m just so hugely disappointed in the once-close friends who have ghosted me after hearing my ex’s side of things but not mine. How do you make peace with this?

Thank you so much.