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My ex tries to use God against me

My ex tries to use God against me

How can one show an abusive ex spouse, his flying monkey crew is on social media stalking & taunting you? (sending messages to the Pastors/life coach portraying him as the victim and me having a non expired Protection Order against him, despite his name is blocked.)

My ex always tried using God against me and his family tried telling me if and when & If I ever left him that God’s gonna get me/I’m in Gods hands meaning gloom in doom
I’m the devil yea ok !

Now since I’ve obtained a Permanent protection order/Non Expire!!! he’s scared I’m gonna collect CS & seeing negative patterns repeated Smear campaigns, indirectly making my name look bad, him breaking the PPO by 3rd party subliminal messages.

I know it’s him, hating fan club because when I try to leave a few times in the past he always calls my former pastor, telling the pastor to make me reconcile, go back to him, he always begged others via social media for prayers, using his emotions to manipulate others playing a good victim.

Do I just ignore it?

Do I just ignore it?


I am searching for an answer to a specific question. I have a narcissistic mother (81 years old) and have a question I have been searching for answers without success. I have limited contact with her at this point in my life. I’m 50 and have a grandchild of my own. When I have to be around her she takes every opportunity to take jabs at me. My question is how do I respond in the moment to this type of behavior? Do I just ignore it/her or tell her it bothers me? I DO NOT want to give her the “high” shes looking for and want to respond in a way that will be best for me. Any advice would be greatly appreciated!

He’s using the house against me

He’s using the house against me

My narcissistic brother who clearly got his traits from my mother has ramped up his controlling nasty behaviour towards me. We unfortunately bought a house 12 year ago as an investment and over the years I’ve lived there, he’s lived there or it’s been let out. Last 6 years he’s been in the property paying for it etc, until about 3 years ago he defaulted every month as he was spending money on drugs , obviously I kicked off as I have a mortgage with my partner and I’d receive horrible texts off him along the lines off “I am disgusted with your lack of pity towards me” we both have endured so much as siblings!! So any way that’s not all, I had my little boy and he never came and seen me for 6 weeks, ‘obviously jealous’ he’s always seemed to have this jealousy towards my partner for taking his sister away , bear in mind I’ve always looked after him until I met my partner and realised he was vile towards me!! He even told his army boss once when he went out drinking and didn’t turn up for parade that he was in hospital as his sister had been diagnosed with cancer!!! So the house, he’s lived in it till last year I asked him to sell it, he let it out to someone without telling me and he failed affordability check to take it on himself, and now he said if his tenant moves out ( he’s told me he will ) he wont be paying anything towards it , he said he’s going bankrupt and he’s helping me !!! He also as normal keeps being so aggressive and nasty even if I’m civil towards him and constantly says I’m a nasty piece of work just like your mother ( she’s also a narc) who I have no contact with , I really dont know how to get away from him , even if he goes bankrupt he’s still on mortgage and the controlling abuse never stops he’s using this house against me.

I feel completely numb

I feel completely numb


Hi there, I only came across your group tonight, which in fact I should have years ago.
Six years ago I started a secret relationship with a married man(which I am not proud of) that was everything I’d ever wanted. Handsome, charming, soft spoken, kind. But things quickly turned sour and I found this MR Right turning into a manipulative and evil individual. He put me down in every possible way, criticizing my appearance, lifestyle, education, family, character…
Not to mention that I found out very soon in the relationship that he had several sexual relationships with women that were not quite appropriate for his exquisite taste.
There was so much pain, low self esteem, self hatred on my part that I sometimes wonder how is it possible that a reasonably bright, fairly attractive woman with a bubbly personality turned into this pile of mess?
He made me believe I was crazy, paranoid, jealous and stupid.
Since I always sensed his dishonesty I found proof of his constant lies and deceit 2 weeks ago.
When I very gently exposed that what he’d told me wasn’t exactly accurate, he slammed the phone down and cut all contact.
I tried to phone back but I don’t exist anymore.I even blamed myself for exposing his lies.
After two weeks of insomnia, anti depressants, alcohol and extreme emotional and physical pain I feel completely numb at times, then totally hysterical at others.
I would be most grateful for some advice.

Am I better off staying single?

Am I better off staying single?

I was married to a Narc for almost 20 years and dated another for nearly 3 years only to find out he was lying and cheating, possibly the entire relationship but I know for sure recently because I found the evidence on his phone. How can I ever trust a man again? The bf knew my story and how my ex husband treated me yet he did so much worse. Now I’m terrified to trust myself not to end up with a third one just like them. Am I better off just staying single?

Should I run?

Should I run?

Looking for advice….have a friend who is very charming and likeable by everyone but I’ve started noticing some things about him that concerns me…..blames all his failed relationships on the other person, constantly makes fun of others for the same things he does, when confronted with a problem he tries to make it look like it’s my fault and when you do get an apology its “I don’t think I did anything wrong, but sorry.” Makes comments that previous women still want him, at times comes off very arrogant like he can do whatever he wants. Should I run before it’s too late?

Is this common?

Is this common?

How many of you, after surviving a relationship with a narcissist, have experienced a loss of (spiritual) faith? My lifelong faith in God is something I never thought I would lose hold of, and after an 11 year marriage to a narcissist, and a successful escape, it is gone. I wonder if this is common?

Am I abusive?

Am I abusive?

I have been with my husband for 20 years now. He IS verbally and emotionally abusive. I am not looking for advice on getting out right now. My question is…he claims that I am also emotionally abusive to him but I do not agree. I try to compromise with him on things when I don’t agree with him on something. Of course when he doesn’t agree he becomes abusive. I can have an argument without making personal attacks. He cannot. I DO control our money. If I do not he will blow it on unnecessary things. Sometimes things that are consumed by him alone and have no benefit to the family and there is nothing to show for it later. Sometimes it’s things that he may keep but again it’s not something he needs. I have no problem with him fulfilling wants but as an adult we all know that we cannot have everything we want at all times. Is it abusive that I have started to control our money? I mean one example is he got into our tax money and spent 200 on games on his phone. I think that’s ridiculous. Then he now wants to buy a 1200 computer. So frustrating.

There is only evidence of her avoiding accountability

There is only evidence of her avoiding accountability

My sibling has finally agreed to go to family therapy. I’m pretty freaked out. She has avoided all ownership of their actions, gaslighted me, projected her behaviour onto me, undermined me, stonewalled me (for over a year), everything from the toxic person’s rule book. Her and my parents desperately want her to be at my wedding and they have been testing boundaries much. My boundaries are – talk things through with a therapist or keep minimal contact, being polite at family events. Now, in a 180 degree turn around, she claims she wants therapy. There is only evidence of her avoiding accountability. She never apologises for anything. Argh. I feel sick inside.

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