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Category: Ask the Audience

I cannot bear to be around when he is present

I cannot bear to be around when he is present

I would like some advice from people whose daughters are in a narcissist relationship on how to handle it. We are very close but I cannot bear to be around when he is present, I don’t want it like this. It hurts me…

My daughter is 25 and they’ve been together on/off for 2 years. They have two children, 2 months and 6 years old.

I really need help

I really need help

I really need help….
I was currently dating an emotional abusive partner for 4 years
1..he isolated me from my friends and family
2..whenever he is wrong he blames me for everything
3..he lies about me
4..he cheated on me
5..he doesn’t apologize or show any regret when he has wronged me…
This past Friday he decided to go out with friends and he came back yesterday 7pm.

I didn’t manage to take all this and decided to leave him today but I don’t regret my decision….did I do wrong or right by leaving him?

Any advice its highly appreciated

 

I’m struggling with my feelings

I’m struggling with my feelings

My narcissistic mother has just suddenly passed away. I’m struggling with my feelings and not entirely sure how to grieve. I’m obviously upset but how do I deal with such conflicting emotions when I’m also feeling relief, anger at the ‘ no closure’ over the 25 plus years of abuse but still mourning the loss of a mother I still loved regardless. Thanks

He keeps messing with me

He keeps messing with me

He just some how keeps messing with me. He’s had me blocked on Facebook since early November and I was notified today by a friend of a couple of songs that he shared on Facebook. The songs would indicate that he’s missing me. After a couple of hours thinking about it I decided to see if he unblocked me. And sure enough, he did. He wants me to see them. I instantly got a nauseous, shaking, and heart racing to my body. Long story, but no matter what, I can not message him since there’s a no contact order between us. So, I think that the hardest part for me is that there was no closure to our break up. I know that I wouldn’t even go back to him even if it was an option. There’s no trust and he has hurt me so much. Even his family talks to me still and tells me how he’s mean to me. When we were together his 24 year old daughter stood up for me serval times. Very rarely do your step kids/step moms have the kind of relationship that her and I had. She always introduced me as her mom. I’m sick wondering what he’s going to do next. I have even been considering moving to the other side of the country because of him and his lies. I just need away from him.

What can I do?

What can I do?

I’m starting to realise my step mother is a narc! My dad is a pleaser… and since being with her she has segregated him from his WHOLE family including his children… she took his mobile off him so now there’s only one way to get in contact and she has full control of the phone… he had to delete his FB page.. he has nothing left that is just for him. It’s so sad to see. In the last 10 years I have seen him 3 times. They travel Oz 6-8 months of the year but spend most of that in upper QLD where her kids are.

She apparently doesn’t like having ‘text convos’ hence you never get a reply… but when they visit she spends the WHOLE time texting with her adult kids and laughing and telling you how amazing they and their kids are..

They caught the next plane to meet the grandies the minute each of her kids went into labour… but didn’t meet mine until he was 3… everything is EVERYONE else’s fault! She is NEVER to blame! Not flying over to meet my son became ‘my fault’ apparently I looked at her wrong 20 years ago or some crap… nun of the crap makes sense… dad sits quietly looking very sad… absolutely kills me to see! My brother and sister haven’t spoken to him in about 15 years… I have only been lucky enough to get the three visits because I’m a stubborn wench and I refuse to stop trying! But holy crap it’s draining and depressing! I just want my dad back. I know now that will never happen. I asked dad why he won’t leave her two visits ago and he cried and said he’s too old to start again, that she will take everything he’s worked for and it’s too scary to be left with nothing… so I know I won’t get him back ever… but what do you do? How do you deal with it? I want to see him more! Most of their 6-8months in Oz is spent only about 3 hours drive from me… but I’m not welcome as I’m not one of her kids…

She’s driving me crazy

She’s driving me crazy

I am currently dealing with a narcissistic person who is my sister-in-law and ex friend. Her taunts, lies, and the ton of stuff she did to embarrass me is driving me crazy. I am getting frustrated and fed up with her and her nonsense. Can you all give me some advice on how to deal with this person?

My ex husband continues to violate boundaries

My ex husband continues to violate boundaries

My narc ex husband is dating a now EX friend of mine. That is betrayal enough (by the friend) but now she’s pushing in on my kids’ lives. Ever since my ex and I split, he has continued to violate boundaries. He has shown up at my family functions at the holidays, and my family unfortunately won’t turn him away. Other than my mom and sister, they either “don’t want to get involved” or think I should just “rise above for the sake of the kids.” Most recently, he took the kids for halloween, and the girlfriend went along. They showed up at 2 of my uncle’s houses and WENT INSIDE. Not just knock-knock, trick or treat. Went in and hung out. I find that super inappropriate (plus, who wants to hang out at their new boyfriend’s ex wife’s family’s house???) I’ve tried talking to my family with no luck. I’ve tried talking to the ex narc, obviously with no results. I’m so hurt and angry. How would you handle?

My daughter at her young age realises the toxic dad she has

My daughter at her young age realises the toxic dad she has

My almost 16 year old daughter is refusing to return to her dad’s house due to his emotional and narcissistic abuse. She has been in counselling for 4 years and cannot take anymore abuse. My daughter at her young age realises the toxic dad she has and I am proud of her for standing up for herself. She has used the tools and techniques her counsellors have given her, yet when she wants no contact from him, the court punishes me.

It is so frustrating when judges force children to be in a toxic environment and that my daughter doesn’t have a voice.

Her dad filed contempt paperwork and he completely blames me for her feelings and emotions.

What advice do you have and are there are any cases/references I should use in my declaration?

My attorney is good, however my ex’s attorney is a master liar and the judges love him.

How do I act, respond?

How do I act, respond?

I have a new managing director at my work. His transition is complete and the old MD has left. I was the first employee along with the MD so the both of us built the company to 10 employees. And I did everything from accounts, HR, office admin.
So five months down the track of the new managing director he shows and has shown so many traits of being a Narcissist.
It started off by questioning everything I did and micromanaging me, making, requesting changes to his ways. He would give me instructions that I would complete, he then was conflicting of his instructions and I started to become confused. Any reminders or ideas I gave he takes as criticism and the ideas he would grab as his own.
On researching and speaking with psychologist I am finally understanding why he is like this. It’s been suggested that I am a threat to him. All the workers look up to me and they approach me for things and suggestions etc. as they always have for the past four years.
Before actually realising his condition I would stick up for myself and correct him which I now understand makes things worse.
I’m having a meeting with him that he has called to outline my tasks and responsibilities and I know this has come from an email I sent before realising the traits about ways to improve our communication to avoid confusion etc. I know he will turn things around and make things my fault as he has done so often and now I know how to deal with a person like this I can’t be defensive and stand up for what I know is right. I would like to Ask the Audience. In this meeting I’m having “How do I act, respond? I’ve never dealt with someone like this before and in normal cases I would defend myself stand up for what I know is right. But on researching I’m not going to be able to do this.
I’m going to have to be blamed ashamed accused and take it all.
How do I react when this happens? Do I sit there and nod, agree with him, ‘yes sir!’
I’m extremely nervous about the whole thing and suffering anxiety that I’ve never had before.
Any advise would be appreciated.
Thank you

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