I don’t want to be on my deathbed regretting

I don’t want to be on my deathbed regretting

Thank you for being here.  Feeling haunted by a former narc abuser who was the director of a dance troupe I was involved in. I went and stayed no contact over six years ago. This person has moved clear across the country.  I am just starting to renew my desire to dance and teach dance again (I loved it most of my life before her) but when I go to practice my body goes numb. I don’t want to be on my death bed regretting not dancing because of her manipulation gas lighting etc.  Any suggestions I would love and welcome.

3 thoughts on “I don’t want to be on my deathbed regretting

  1. Please could I post this anon? Thanks.
    Please research and ask your doctor about complex post traumatic stress disorder. It seems to me the dancing is still triggering you. This is totally understandable particularly if you haven’t done it since being with your ex. You need to mentally sever the tie of the act of dancing to your experiences with your ex. It isn’t easy but it can be done!Do as much research on c-ptsd as you can and ask your doctor about a possible referral for Cognitive Behaviour Therapy. Good luck to you ☺

  2. Thank you so much for your advice! I understand the ptsd connection intellectually but need help healing it. I haven’t stopped dancing completely it has just been the past three weeks when I began to outline a dance program that has been requested I teach at the rec center I work at……some of it in her style that is when I started to freeze up. Will speak to my doctor for sure. Thankyou so much for taking the time to reply to my question I so need the support.

  3. I have complex post traumatic stress disorder. It is the severest form of PTSD, and is relentless. What you describe sounds very similar. Tone, where and how people stand, and groups of three or more can set me off. Melanie Tonia Evan’s ‘narcissistic abuse recovery programme has really helped me to heal a lot of my triggers. Melanie also does utube videos on triggers and how they affect you. What you describe is symptomatic of a trigger, and they can leave one feeling catatonic if not dealt with.

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