Can someone be manipulated by a narcissist from afar?

Can someone be manipulated by a narcissist from afar?

I mean I’m new to this, I didn’t know much about narcissists or manipulation tactics until more recently. I’ve spent so many years feeling worthless and confused and keep in mind, I gave this person a chance originally because he made me feel more amazing than any guy had made me feel close by. I don’t know what it was but he convinced me that we were soulmates and that our future was so bright. (I mean now that I look back, all of this was thrown at me so fast, even before I ever really expressed caring about him.)

then out of nowhere, he’d be so aggressive and he’d ignore me for days or weeks. He’d get mad if I needed to be there for my family. He’d expect me to come visit even after doing all of this…but part of me just couldn’t, maybe because I couldn’t shake the feeling that this wasn’t right and I didn’t want my daughter to be stuck in the situation too. He’d lie to me about things then when I addressed them, he’d deny it no matter how overwhelmed it made me. Then when he could no longer cover up that lie, he’d admit and basically say “what’s the big deal?”

He’s called me names just for going out with friends on occasions. He would accuse me of cheating if I liked a certain picture on social media, even though all he ever did was like pictures of half naked women. Anytime I addressed any of this, it took weeks and it’s like..it was never resolved, all I’d hear is that I don’t appreciate anything or that he’s stressed out. He’s told me so many times in so many ways that I am worthless. He’ll withdraw for long periods of time and claim to have no idea what I’m talking about once it’s mentioned…then when I stand my ground, he’ll say that he did it because I did something else wrong and he was upset about it apparently.

To make matters worse, I’ve tried to end the relationship many times during all of this and it’s like he’ll threaten suicide or he’ll get really aggressive and he’ll rant about all of my supposed wrong doings..

Like I’ve tolerated a lot and it’s like he’s making me feel like I owe him my presence when he’s already made me miserable and confused from afar..

3 thoughts on “Can someone be manipulated by a narcissist from afar?

  1. Absolutely. I knew my narc for eight years. Three in the same city and five from 3000 miles away. At first it seems doable and exciting; but it’s worse. Every time they leave you or you leave them; you start the healing process over and over again.
    When at home I was reduced to sexting and pics; which constantly cause me to battle my moral compass.
    When I finally refused that type of contact anymore; he went away.

  2. This was my life for 2 years. It was never you. Understand that as difficult as it feels. You were used and he is already on to the next victim. It took my hours of therapy for me to heal but he will never change. Be free. You are so much better off without him.

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