Nightmare situation for us

Nightmare situation for us

Has anyone ever used the diagnosis of narcissistic personality disorder against them in court regarding custody of children?  We’re in court soon.  He’s wanting the children and is doing anything just to get them, he’s making the children say they want to live with him – nightmare situation for us. He is diagnosed with a few conditions from his upbringing.  Any ideas opinions would be helpful.  Thank you.

17 thoughts on “Nightmare situation for us

  1. I’m living with an narricist abusive man for 25 years ( married)
    A year ago I realized our relationship is not normal after voicing my life with him to girls at work. I just want to die because I really believe that him and his mother controll me and my kids.waiting till kids are out of school and running away

    1. As a child of a narcissist, I would strongly recommend that you try really hard to get out now. He is damaging your children, a harm that will make it very difficult for them to live loving lives. Please leave.

      1. It sounds like they are already away from the narcissist. He is trying to take her kids.

        Been there, done that. God helped me through it!

  2. What do you mean by a few conditions from his upbringing? More info. would help me to give you accurate advice. I have a lot of experience with going to court for custody, etc.

  3. Do you currently have full custody of the children? What do you mean about problems and conditions from his upbringing? I had a similar situation with my ex-husband. It was a long process and very emotional. I’m happy to give some advice, just need some more info. if you don’t mind sharing. This website has been so helpful for me. It’s EVERYTHING to have a safe place to vent and talk.

    Keep your head up! You will figure this out.

    1. Hi there
      im afraid of telling too much in case he see this site. Is there any chance that he could?

      1. Unless he knows that you are specifically on this site seeking counsel, I’d say it was slim to none that he would find it. Especially since you are posting anonymously and not using your name. This site has people from all over the world. It is public however, so I suppose there is a chance. Obviously don’t share any info. you are not comfortable sharing. Like I said, this site helped me through a painful divorce and custody battle. Having people that have gone through or are going through similar situations was a tremendous comfort to me, especially since I do not have a strong family network. To be honest, I relocated for my husband and didn’t have many friends. I had lost contact with my old friends as well. Internet “friends” were my main source of comfort. I’m not ashamed to admit that. Faith in God and helpful advice from people who have been in abusive relationships is key. We are all warriors!

      2. Are you afraid of him hurting you? If so, you should get a protective order. I think this is a safe place but with that being said, it is public. Unless he knows that you frequent this site, I’d say you are safe.

  4. Court cases can be tricky. But there are many things you can use against a narcissist. My ex was so controlling over all of us. I’m so happy our divorce got finalized.

    1. Good for you, Tracey.

      Hard work (and good karma) pay off! God is on the side of victims. Keep having faith!!!

  5. ok I’ll try
    we’ve been in court for over a year now. He is diagnosed with Complex Post Traumatic Stress, Narcissism, A Personality Disorder because of his upbringing including neglect and abuse. The court have the medical reports but never refer it it. he’s working on the children saying they want to live with him and the court will listen because of the older ones age of 12. cafcass are involved .
    I agree about this web site Its a life line and got so much information on. I’ve bought the 2 books Lundy Bancroft had published, found them really good.

    1. It will be a benefit to have Cafcass involved. To your children most of all.

      Why do they never refer to medical reports? And do you have proof of him brainwashing the children to say they want to live with him? Hopefully you have text messages, voicemails, etc.

      Love Lundy. Healing & Hope! Helped me through some hard times.

      1. we have tape recordings of the children talking and a couple of skyp recordings of him talking to them,…. I was going to transcribe these as I don’t think they would accept tape recordings, but they are there if needed. His brief keeps saying he isn’t diagnosed with anything and mine keeps reminding them but it goes nowhere. cafcass seem to have the measure of things but keep saying if the older boy wants to go the court will listen to that and they wont split them up. It sounds crazy as I say and think it, that it can come to this after all the children have gone through. I wish Lundy was in uk and we could use him, he makes so much sense of everything.
        Is there any reliable information on the web that can be used, so much is US, I’ve looked up NHS and MIND – but I was thinking more about the outcomes for children in a narcissists care, or lack of it. He has stalled police reports but we have got around that and we have them now. thank you for listening everyone

  6. I need an answer very much- I am told by Barrister that tape recordings he says ‘are disgusting’ even so should not have been taken. They prove 100% the mental abuse of a child. I read reports that tapes will work against you and cannot be used. Surely Cafcass or the Court ought to allow something that would prove so categorically??

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