In his head he blames me for it all.
Can you please create a post? I’m struggling to not be bitter. My ex purposely pretended to reconcile with me. Going to marriage guidance, crying, taking depression tablets. The reality was it was one big con. He was really stealing our money, hiding assets, promoting his girlfriend (he wanted to rely on that money alone to pay maintenance so it was free). The sheer agony of every day with the mental and physical abuse. Only for him to move her in and humiliate me by flaunting her around people who fell out with me for taking him back after the first round of the sane treatment. Since then I’ve done a lot of reading about this condition and that is of some comfort. They got married the other day and whilst they live abroad, I still hate him for what he did. It seems so unfair he got away with my money, my daughter’s bank account and property by lying and stealing. A big part of me is so grateful I am out if it. That woman who thinks she has scored big with him for his cash will happily cash in every penny one day for her sanity. He has nothing to do with our son. How do I move forward 100% and not feel so bitter and how do I not feel like he’s coming back to haunt me in future (to reduce maintenance). He told me he had set up something nasty for me. Is that just words?? In his head he blames me for it all. He is truly sick. I just want to not look back and have these niggling thoughts. Any advice please from anyone? Thanks.
3 thoughts on “In his head he blames me for it all.”
I would move and get a restraining order against him….so, so sad to hear about your sadness of all of his bullshit he heaped on you….I think most of us are big hearted and we’re “sucked back in” with their cleverness…….they are MONSTERS….and my family also turned against me thinking I must like the abuse…….ridiculous…well, the narc. had been working underhanded for YEARS AND YEARS under the radar and no one truly knows the damage they have done…but they are being exposed now, and we all need to talk about their tactics now and NOT BE EMBARRASSED BUT, to be strong and use your information too for exposure of them and their tactics….they make you afraid to press charges against them…at least I was….honey, CHALK IT UP TO EXPERIENCE…I had the same thing happen to me on a lesser scale, and I was ANGRY.,,,don’t let it eat away at you♡♡ this site is a good one to release steam……my heart is aching for you…..talk to your family about it all when you come out of the blenderof bullshit he caused for you ♡♡♡ Sincerely……
Bless your heart. I completely understand. Bitterness is a tough one. Time.
It…is…not…your…fault!!!
Someday your little boy will be grown and then he will have nothing to hold over you. You are so very strong and you will get through this. You can begin again.
When i am deep in that place, I tell myself…so many people have lost everything…due to natural disasters, poor health, accidents. We survivors are very strong people! It is hard, so very very hard. But, we are everywhere! And we are starting over away from the monsters. Be kind to yourself, don’t beat yourself up. Crawl through the anguish if you must. Life will get better!
I completely understand after going through this as well, I didn’t peruse harsher charges with my husband after physical abuse which has left me disabled for life because he said he still loved me,he went to marriage counseling also went on pills to control his anger. After he learned he was going to get off probation early it started all over again. At this point I felt like I had been used so he could beat the system it was a big lunpunch in the gut. I have recently left and filed for divorce it’s just been a mess and hard to get over but with God by my side I am slowly trying to move forward. Because of my feelings it was extremely hard to leave but I knew it was coming again and didn’t want to suffer anymore .please know you have support out there and please take advantage of it or it will not be easy to get rid of the bitterness as I am learning slowly
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