I need some wisdom

I need some wisdom

Not sure we can ask here, but I feel like I’m going mad. I think I’m falling for yet another Narc. I need some wisdom from the audience and insight and maybe someone to tell me that maybe I’m overreacting because of my past experiences. So, this new bloke:
  • messages me everyday and calls me frequently
  • tells me how beautiful I am and how much he wants me
  • at the same time he’s never available to see me – I haven’t seen him for two   months now – says he is not seeing anyone, just busy
  • didn’t show up twice without explanation, only after said ‘oh sorry’
  • completely ignores my attempts to communicate that this behaviour is confusing and making me unwell.
I attempted suicide during my previous relationship with a Narc. I’m worried that either I’m paranoid and too sensitive or this is just not headed in the right direction.

9 thoughts on “I need some wisdom

  1. No one is that busy, sorry but that is complete bull shit, blowing off your feelings and acting like they don’t exist is a sure sign of a narc. I would get away from him, stop contact and move on, this will not end well if you continue.

  2. Drop it. Sounds like manipulation from what you posted. If they really cared effort would be made to show their level of commitment. Given that it has been a couple of months now like this it just shows that he is playing you. I am a guy so I can say that a guy really wants to be with you he will make it happen. Again, sorry to say but drop it. For your sake at a minimum.

  3. Forgive my bluntness here. So you attempted suicide in a previous narc relationship. You’re being treated with total disrespect and disregard, and you’re already questioning whether or not your perceptions are paranoid or too sensitive? Sounds like you’re already falling into cognitive dissonance. This man is clearly SOMETHING personality disordered – he has no regard whatsoever for your feelings as he is already ignoring your attempts to communicate about them. WHATEVER he is, is not your concern. YOUR CONCERN is why you’re already allowing yourself to be treated like this, yet again. Block him and go no contact whatsoever. Of course he will come around and “love bomb” just to get control over you again. Get as far from this as quickly as possible. This man is a MAJOR NARC. Your gut instinct is spot on – your head is trying to ignore it. Proceed at your own peril friend.

  4. The feeling like you’re going mad is right on the mark. He has been slowly tormenting you with his unrelenting confusing, “crazy making” methods. Trust your feelings. They were wrought from all the heart wrenching pain and suffering you have experienced your entire life. You now yourself better than anyone else ever could.

    Only relationships that practice mutual respect, courtesy and basic civility can head in the right direction. And then when each wants only good for the other, they build each other up and both actually enjoy putting the other first and are always looking for little ways to brighten the other’s day. The “wait” can be difficult, but, absolutely worth it!! Somewhere, he is waiting for you too.
    (I intentionally kept my words few regarding Mr. Oh, Sorry. I hope you quietly shut that door and mentally mark it with an ☠️ as a reminder to never, ever open it again.)

  5. You already know the answer to your question. The wisdom you need is this: We should almost never make decisions based on our emotions. We make decisions based on knowledge and wisdom. If we choose to do something because of how we ‘feel’ we will likely regret that choice as soon as our mood changes. Making decisions based on what we know to be true is the way to not regret our actions! Its okay if your feelings don’t agree with what you know to be true. You make the right choices and your feelings will catch up.
    What advice would you give to someone in your situation? Relationships dont take months at a time breaks! If a man truly loves a woman, she will never have to wonder if he does..ever! Please always remember that no one ever wants to die..they just feel they can’t live with the pain they feel. That’s never a reason to leave this world because God can take the pain we experience and bless us through it ..I know for a fact this is true. 🙂 Bee happy!

  6. Run and run fast. Don’t look back. Think of YOU and only YOU and your emotional and mental health and well being. He is clearly a narc. Don’t question your gut instincts as that is God speaking to you. Trust it and send this man on his way without any contact.

  7. I totally agree with the 3 replies ahead of me, I do suggest you learn to read and trust your own intuition, which is obviously working well.

  8. Run now and get far away. I just went through that, I even tried leaving multiple times and heard, “I can’t lose you, I will be devastated.” Then, four months later he just quit talking to me and won’t tell me anything.

  9. Dear
    First if you have to ask, you know the answer…! no contact is the best for you with this person.

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