Could her husband have turned her into a narcissist?

Could her husband have turned her into a narcissist?

Since I found your Facebook page several months ago, I have gone to it just about every day. I have a question, can someone be turned into a narc, if they have been married to a narc, for a long time, in this case almost 25 years.  When I know for a fact this was NOT the case before the marriage and a good 7-8 years after and slowly but surely seems to me had happened! Neither one of them now will take responsibility for anything and do nothing but play them blame game, have no respect and worst of all talk over me whenever I speak and try to reason.  If I can get a minute’s break, It’s seems my words are not heard, the quite is just long enough to continue to run her/ their agenda, hardly ever validating and acknowledge anything! The insults fly and constantly justifying anything and everything thing, good bad or indifferent! It’s frustrating, infuriating, and heart-breaking too.

So can this be a learned behaviour for survival, or brainwashing?
How sad our society has become that it is seemingly everyone has this in their lives! And this is really heart-breaking, it’s my daughter, but I’ve seen on the page I’m by far alone there either.  Could her husband have turned her into a narc?  No matter thank you, from everything I’ve read on the page and her behaviour, disrespectful,  taking no responsibility for anything, blaming, hurtful  words, her behaviour is a mirror image of what her husband’s has always been, after almost 25 years of marriage! She is not the girl I raised and had a very good relationship with. I do not know that person! Her husband has succeeded in tearing our tiny family apart. Sorry for going on, I need a therapist, I’m senior and need to find out if it’s covered. I stopped crying a while ago because now it’s a callous on my heart but I cried a river over the last 16 plus years.

7 thoughts on “Could her husband have turned her into a narcissist?

  1. I was wondering the same since I realized that what I thought it was a really evil flying monkey, had a lot of Narcissistic traits.

  2. Did she “become a narcissist” or was she just able to keep the mask on for a longer than usual period of love bombing? No one wants to believe they were duped. And the longer the relationship, the harder it is to accept that it was all a lie. I’m not a professional and there really isn’t a way to answer this with 100% certainty. But, here’s my thoughts. 1) You can never believe anything a Narcissist has told you about their past. They have such a skewed perspective that what they recite probably has little to do with reality. No matter how many times they repeated it to you, it is their version of history and nothing more. 2) Narcissist project! There is a high likelihood that they themselves are guilty of what they have accused the other of doing. 3) Most victims of narcissistic abuse are highly triggered by these actions and would never inflict this kind of evil on another human being. Narcissist are usually drawn to empaths. Although there are times when two Narcissists are mutually using each other which may have been the case in this situation. It’s really sad all around.

  3. I don’t believe a person just develops narcissism. There are two sides to every story. Maybe the parent is a narc themselves and is seeing her daughter’s independence as “hurtful” since she can no longer control and manipulate her? The daughter may have married a narc since her parent(s) was/were and she may have developed narc “fleas” from her husband? The narc parent can be seeing the boundary setting and independence by the adult child as “mean” and “not the child she raised.” Its a loss of control of the adult child. And, narc parents do infantalize their children. Just my opinion.

    1. With all due respect …that is a totally & completely wrong take on this question!!

  4. I was with a narcissist for 13 years, after I left I did notice myself behaving and acting like him, it took a good few years for the brainwashing to go but thankfully it did. Your daughter will hopefully realise that she is not acting like herself and make the necessary changes. I used inner child healing to save myself , I had to go through a process of reliving every traumatic event so as I could release my suppressed emotions. Yes it is definitely learned behaviour they make you numb as you are laughed at for crying and shouted at for laughing with a narc it’s their way or no way.

  5. I do believe you mimic traits of a narc simply because you are brainwashed into his thinking and controlling behaviour but narcissistic personality disorder doesn’t rationalise so I don’t believe you are narcissistic

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